In important, breaking news, a Florida snake “expert” who was bitten for the 44th time by a venomous snake (fool me 43 times…) is in the hospital with a swollen arm and a bad case of the dumbfucks.
This is sort of like when there’s a tragic extreme kayaking accident or a horrific “over the falls in a barrell” mishap. In our opinion, when you put yourself in danger to support your awesome, goofy lifestyle (or to fatten up your resume as “Cobraman”), it’s not really a tragedy. “Oh man, I am so sad that uncle ‘Cobraman’ got hurt.” “Well, uncle ‘Cobraman’ did spent a lot of his time in tank tops cleaning shit out of the cages of his deadly pets’ cages.”
The rattlesnake is now safe in a zoo in an undisclosed state (for his own protection - there must be a “Rattlesnakeman” out there somewhere who’s just dying to show the world that this was a total fluke.
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